Last week I bared all about my plight through unemployment, overcoming depression & the hang-ups associated with both. This week, i want to delve a bit deeper into the impact of status frustration, and the relief one feels when life chills out and one can finally "just be".
Poloneck Jumper : WAREHOUSE | Trousers : ASOS (£3! #BrokeGirlsGuide will resume soon)
As a 1st generation migrant millennial, the concept of 'content' is alien to me. I moved (with my family) to the West, in the hopes of greener pastures. The expectation to exceed peers back home & excel to the apex of one's chosen career was evident from the gate. Thankfully, my parents are anarchists; never subscribing to the status quo, or dictating what their children should study or inevitably work as. The world was our oyster, with the only precursor being our bid to work in line with our purpose. Not sure which burden is greater in retrospect; pointing a child in a particular line of study, or urging them to figure out who they want to be for the rest of their life from age 13.
Point being, and I'm sure a lot of my readers can relate, there was no pause. Between excelling in academia, socialising effectively to amount to networking, and honing one's hobbies into a lucrative side-hustle (#BrokeGirlsGuide to the side-hustle is brewing), among the umpteenth other things one must do to survive, it's hard to take a chill. The pressure to succeed is ever more magnified now that your peers' every movement is documented on social media, in case you ever wished to partake in a comparative exercise.
So when the going got tough, I imploded and exploded and life finally fell in line with my vision (or the greater vision; purpose), what was left for me to do but just be? I could go back to the drawing board and start drafting new goals, but I learned the hard way that all that amounts to is frustration and comparison, or vice-versa. Instead, what I have chosen to do is live life in the moment, and to the fullest. Appreciate each passing moment, with my nearest and dearest, and invest in myself; becoming the richest and fullest version of me I can be. That has resulted in devoting more time to God, eating clean and exercising, becoming devoted to looking my best each and every day, spending time with people who will enrich and not rob me emotionally, among other things.
Heels : Debenhams
So what exactly am I driving at? Well...life is an eternal race, until the length we are all granted to live. We could spend our time biding for the next challenge or hurdle, but what does that serve? Time without number I have reiterated the emptiness that pitting oneself against another will result in. I am not an advocate for stagnation, but neither am I a supporter of driving at goals endlessly, at the expense of living one's life presently, to the fullest. What would it cost to just be? To stave off gunning for the next and just revel in what you have. Hope for more, by all means, but appreciate what you currently have. I am all for striving for a better you, but take the time to bask in who you are at present. If you don't, no one else can, talk less of will.
To live is to see, and just be.